See the Light

This weekend has been fantastic! It started off with a really great experience. On Friday night Audrey, Debi, Ted, Caitie and I went hiking up to Squaw peak. We began around 8:30 pm and ended at around 12:30 am. The whole way up we all talked and told stories. We sang silly songs and wondered if we would survive. 'Feel the burn!' I kept telling myself. And somehow, one footstep at a time, we made it to the top. When we got there, and I saw our surroundings, it took my breath away. On one side, were the extraordinary city lights of beautiful Provo (Caitie said they look like fireworks upside-down). :) On the other side, were incredible mountain peaks that seemed surreal in their beauty. As we got nearer the top, I became more and more peaceful. I didn't talk myself into that feeling, it just came. At the top of the mountain, with the wind whipping all around me, I felt like I was in the temple. My heart was so full, I felt tears come to my eyes. Caitie started singing, "See the Light" from our musical in Kirtland. We sang that song during the temple dedication in the show. How fitting to sing it at the tops of the mountains. I joined in, drinking in the spirit of the song and the energy of the mountains. I really felt closer to heaven. It's hard to explain. It was beautiful.

On the way down, Caitie and I talked about some thoughts we both had while on the hike. I told her that while I was going up the mountain, I had the thought that if it were anyone else leading the group on the hike other than Ted, I would feel very uncomfortable. But, because I trusted him in the mountains and I knew he would lead us where we needed to be, I was all right. There were a few times when my imagination ran away with me and I kept seeing things in the woods that weren't there. Ted told me to relax and I would be fine. As I thought about that, I realized that's what I need to be more like with my Savior. I need to trust Him implicitly. I do not need to be afraid of the steps I need to take for my growth because I know He will only lead to do those things that are good for me and will lead me to my eternal goals. It was powerful for me.

Caitie's insight was that when she first started the hike, she looked way ahead at where we were going and began to get overwhelmed and tired. When she only looked ahead at the next step, she realized she could handle it. We talked about how the Savior only shows us one step of our life at a time. And sometimes when we get more than that, we become overwhelmed and discouraged-thinking we're not strong enough to handle all that's ahead of us.

The Lord is over all. He guides us and leads us every step of the way. He also finds those little moments to teach us the little insights that we need to make it to the next step. And every step of the way, He shows us even more beautiful scenery. I'm so grateful for Him.

I have a new niece!

Meet Rachel Lovina Gardner!!! She is the newest member of our family. :) She was born May 22, 2006 at 4:46 am. She was 8 lbs. 7 oz. and 21 inches long. Isn't she beautiful? I'm convinced she came out singing!

She's already smiling!!! Rachel with Mommy.

Rachel with her big bros! They love her!

What a beautiful family!

Rachel with Daddy. :)

ASL

Today in my American Sign Language class we had a story-telling test. I'm not incredibly confident of my signing abilities, but I understand others fairly well. Because of that, I was very nervous for this test. As I walked into the room, our teacher had a video camera set up to record us. One by one, the students voluntarily came up to the front of the room and signed their funny stories. I wanted to be the last one up - in hopes that everyone else would leave the room before I got up to sign. No such luck. I was 5th to last because there were people even more nervous than I!

As soon as I started signing, I realized my hands don't work when I sign. When I signed "fall" (which is having two fingers falling on your other hand as if they were legs), I used 5 fingers instead of two. I know the person falling did not have 5 limbs. I also kept using man as mom. My hands shook while I finger-spelled. I told the story out of order... ugh... it did not turn out as pretty as I was hoping. However, it was a funny story, and the teacher did laugh. That's a plus. :)

I love sign language. I love Deaf culture. Helen Keller once said something to the effect of: "Blindness separates people from things. Deafness separates people from people." I am so grateful to be learning sign language. I love being able to communicate with these incredible people.

I also love Deaf jokes. Here are a couple I have seen recently that I thought were amusing. Enjoy!

1) There was a logger. He went to cut down a tree. He used his ax a few times, yelled "timber," and the tree fell. Then chopped for a while on a second tree, yelled "timber," and that tree fell as well. He went through the same process with a third tree, but the third tree wouldn't fall over. So he tried a chain saw, and then explosives, finally he called in a "Tree Doctor." The doctor checked out the tree, thought about what to do for a minute then fingerspelled "T-I-M-B-E-R." The third tree finally fell down. The doctor explained to the lumberjack that this particular tree was Deaf.


2) "A huge giant is stalking through a small village of wee people, who are scattering through the streets, trying to escape the ugly creature. The giant notices one particularly beautiful blonde woman scampering down the cobble-stoned street. He stretches out his clumsy arm and sweeps her up, then stares in wonder at the slight, shivering figure in his palm. "You are so beautiful," he exclaims. The young woman looks up in fear. "I would never hurt you, he signs, "I love you! We should get MARRIED." Producing the sign MARRY, he crushes her. The giant then laments, "See, oralism is better."

Weather or not... :)

I love weather. It affects me more than it should. But, I love it.

I love wind. I love the smell of wind before rain. I love dancing by myself in the wind. I love wearing long skirts in the wind. I love playing basketball in the wind. I love the feeling of wind through my hair. I love running in the wind. I love the leaves that fly everywhere when it is windy. I love flying kites. I love singing in the wind.

I love rain. I love having the raindrops fall on my face while I look up at the sky in wonder. I love swimming in my lawn at home when it floods. I also love seeing the ducks swim in my lawn at home when it floods. My front yard really becomes a small pond. I love running in the rain. Even though it's a big dangerous, I love swimming in the rain.

I love snow. My first kiss was in the snow. I love going sledding. I love building snow forts and having snowball fights with my brothers and sister. I love the way the snow sparkles when it is new. I used to pretend the ground was full of diamonds and crystals when I was a little girl. I love drinking hot cocoa while watching snow fall from my window. I love reading books when it is snowy outside.

I love sunshine. I love playing tennis, basketball, volleyball-basically any sport. I'll even add I love watching softball games. :) I love swimming. I love picnics. I love parks. I love playing with my nieces and nephews in the sandbox. I love the feeling of the sun on my face. I love the cheerfulness of the world when it is sunny. I love the beach. I love lying on the grass in the sun. I love the flowers. I love the trees.

I feel almost like I should be singing, "I love the mountains, I love the rolling hills. I love the flowers. I love the daffodils. I love the firesides when all the lights are low... boomdiyada, etc...."

Life is beautiful. I'm grateful for weather.

Happy Mother's Day

This is a tribute to my Mother

I grew up in a home of 6 boys and two girls. I have two parents who love their children and are still in love with each other. My Father is a doctor. He's a good doctor at that. My Mother is a homemaker-and a good one at that. :)

When I was a little girl, there was always something going on at my house. Either the boys had a soccer, basketball, baseball, wrestling, tennis, or football game/meet/match, or Mom had relief society meetings or Dad had scouts. It was always busy. It was loud. The boys wrestled with each other. They played sports in the house (which they weren't really supposed to do :) ). We had two pianos. One was upstairs and one was downstairs. They were always being used. I remember we used to fight over whose turn it was to play piano. Our fighting wasn't actually fighting. It was more like teasing and tickling until the person playing gave up. We could then play till the next sibling decided it was their turn and then the cycle began again. My home was busy. My home was loud. My home was fun.

Mealtime was always a favorite time of the day. It's not easy feeding 8 growing children - 6 of whom were boys. We used to go through 17 gallons of milk a week. That's not an exaggeration! We ate a lot of food. I loved waking up in the morning to the smell of poached eggs on toast or rice pudding or custard. Mom cooked breakfast, lunch and dinner. We were always fed well. Mom taught my sister and I how to cook. She would give us the assignment of making cream of wheat for breakfast. We read the instructions together. She taught us what certain terms meant. She taught me how to pour the cream of wheat in carefully so as not to make the cereal lumpy. I learned what she meant by lumpy after I finished the cereal. I was so proud of my lumpy cream of wheat.

That instilled the love of cooking. Not just cooking, but cooking for other people. We always had company over to eat dinner with us. Sunday dinners usually brought about 40 people to feed. If there was someone in the ward that Mom and Dad felt like we should get to know, they invited them over for dinner. They also went through the missionary dinner list and always invited the missionaries over for the days they didn't have a meal. I don't think we ever really had the money to do that. But, we did it anyway. Mom told me a story once about her Mom. Gammy and my Mom and her siblings had just gotten baptized. They moved from California to Provo, Utah where they had no money. One Sunday, they put a teeny tiny roast in the oven with a couple potatoes because that was all they had for dinner. When they came home from church though, Gammy told Mom to find some bread and see if they had any more food to put on the table. When my Mom asked why, Gammy said they had invited a new, young family over for dinner. Mom was perplexed. She said, "Mom, we don't even have enough for our own family - let alone this new family." Gammy told my Mom that the Lord would provide because He was the one that suggested inviting the family over. It was true. They had plenty of food for both families. The Lord truly does watch over my Mom. I have seen that my entire life.

My Mom has incredible faith. I really have never met a woman with more faith than my own Mother. She wrote a musical that changed people's lives even though she doesn't know how to write music. The Lord gave her that musical because she is a pure vessel with enough faith to see it through. When our family needed a new van for the ten of us, Mom decided what kind of van she wanted. She prayed for an 11 passenger van with a lot of room in the back for luggage and tents. She specified the price and asked if the van could be gray on the outside and Burgundy on the inside. The next day, she looked in the paper. It said there was a 15-passenger van for sale. The back seat had been lost so it was now an 11-passenger van and there was a ton of room in the back for luggage. It was gray on the outside with a Burgundy interior. The price was exactly the price-range my Mom had asked for. This is not an uncommon occurrence. If you knew my Mom, you would know this to be true. My sister in-law Brittany calls it "Gardner faith". You go for something relying completely on the Lord for it to happen. It's scary, but there's an inner peace knowing the Lord will take care of it. We learned it from our Mom.

My Mom is a friend. She is a friend to all of her children. She and Dad always waited up for us kids whenever we went out with friends or on dates. When we came home, she always asked us how it went. We felt safe talking to her because we knew she loved us no matter what happened. The same goes for my Dad. There were a lot of late nights. Especially with so many kids doing different things all the time.

Mom taught me through example to love the Lord completely. He is always there for you. He will always answer your prayers. He loves everyone and so should we. He understands you. I loved driving in the car with Mom when we could talk about gospel principles. I loved reading scriptures at 5:30 in the morning with my family before the boys had seminary and Dad had work. I loved having family council. I loved having family home evening. I loved singing songs with my family. We did that sometimes on Sundays and when we did dishes as a family. I love hearing my Mother pray. I can feel her connection with Heavenly Father. I love her testimony. I love hearing her teach. She and my Dad are the best teachers I have ever had. They truly are incredible.

I love my Mom's silly sense of humor. She loves puns. She loves to be silly. Her side of the family is a blast to be around because their humor is not sarcastic and it doesn't hurt anyone. They tell funny jokes and puns. They love silly word games. I think silly is a very good word to describe them. My Mom's mom writes children's books. They rhyme and are funny and "Suessish". :)

My Mom instilled a love of reading in me. I used to see her reading all the time and I decided I wanted to understand why she loved it so much. We went to the library together and checked out Nancy Drew books, Anne of Green Gables, Jane Austin, Charlotte and Emily Bronte, Charles Dickens. I LOVE reading. Thank you for that, Mom.

My Mom has lived in the Philippines, Mexico, all throughout the United States. She supported my Dad through medical school. She taught her children to love music. She taught her children to love each other. She taught her children to love other people - no matter what had happened to them or how they were. She taught her children to love the Lord and the gospel of Jesus Christ. My Mom is the most incredible woman I know. I feel honored to be known as Cristie Gardner's daughter.

"Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. "
"The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her... she will do him good and not evil all the days of her life."
"She girdeth her loins with strength, and it strengtheneth her arms."
"She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy."
"Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come."
"She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness."
"She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness."
"Her children arise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her."
"Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all."

My Mother is truly an "elect lady". I love her. Happy Mother's Day Mom.